Tuesday, January 01, 2013

Hello 2013

Oh, 2012!  This year was a challenging one for me -  involving lots of letting go and growing up and patience and hope.  Yet, I do think it's ending just as it should be, and definitely on a high note. 

I've been off work for the past 10 days for Winter Break and it has been really nice to have a lot of extra time to spend with family, decorating and rearranging stuff in the apartment, crocheting, baking, watching TV shows (Game of Thrones!) and movies, and just spending time at home.  I also did some reflecting on this year and started to set some goals and resolutions for 2013.

It's felt overwhelming at times: trying to figure out what I want in 2013, thinking of how I want it to be different from 2012, and how I want things to be just as they are right now.  

2013 will be the first full year where I will no longer be a student of any sort.  I will no longer have both a full-time job and a part-to-full-time graduate school schedule to deal with.  It's been this way since about August, but the last few months have still been a learning curve for me.  I am so used to having some type of obligation to occupy my spare time, that I forget how to relax and enjoy that time without guilt or a list of things to do looming over my head.  It's definitely been refreshing and fun to work on creating things again and reading for pleasure and cooking a bit more at home.  These are all things I want to do more of in 2013.   

The other night, I sat down on the sofa in the living room with a cup of hot chocolate and Susannah Conway's wonderful workbook, Unravelling the Year Ahead.  I chose my word for 2013 and mapped out some goals for the year.  I want to finally make big changes to my life...particularly in how I take care of myself and my health.  

Earlier this month, I went to Houston for my scans.  I still get twice annual scans to be sure the neuroendocrine tumor in my chest is not growing, and I'm very grateful to report that it has not.  However, being back at M.D. Anderson and thinking of those days when I was newly diagnosed and uncertain about my future, reminded me of how incredibly fortunate I am to be healthy and alive.  I know I can't control whether or not the tumor does grow or spread, but I do know that I can make changes to my diet and exercise more to stay healthy and maybe prevent other complications and illnesses.  

So, I think I'm ready for Change (my word for 2013).  I know it won't be easy and I know that I will sometimes falter, but my plan is to always keep trying and following through.

Most of the things on my 32 before 32 list reflect the way I want my 2013 to be.  I don't think I need another list of things, but rather a plan of action to do what I set out to do.  I'm definitely working on that and hope to revisit those goals often and write about my progress here on the blog, so I hope that I have much to share in 2013.  For those of you who read and visit this space...thank you.  I wish you all the best in the new year!!

{the photos are bits and pieces of my office/studio room where I keep all my pretty scented candles, craft supplies, books, and plants} 

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